Being mind fucked since days. Finally I made my mind to get my MRI scan done after a week of severe ache in chest.
Living like a hobo its weird reason being unknown its so very weird. Living like this is better than ever but take a lot from me bank balance is almost down as floor and my self esteem is at negative but It provided me a place better than home "Gurudwaras" feels like living there Always, I earns there most precious earning its an only place on earth that doesn't cost you for Pleasure no where else I've ever found this, those images those msges, those thoughts, those mind diverts nothing at all is heavy than the eye of Him. But being unwell living a life of half dead on a hospital bed for Thirty nine days. Blood samples, scans, routine pills, injection punctures & still Pain in times without earnings and decreasing savings. All saved sum was for one reason and that reason is dead now. So it had to go in some direction still feels its going towards you, you must be really happy.
No dreams no savings no fulfilment
Dead me dead hope even hearts dead.
Bhatthi walie chambe diye daaliye, Peeran da paraga bhun de
Tainu dewaan hanjuan da bhaara, Peeran da paraga bhun de
Translation
Oh flower of jasmine, you own the oven, bake me one lot of pain
I’ll pay you in terms of tears, bake me one lot of pain
Being in this illusionary Idioticness I waited for someone who doesnt Exist, Faulty was me all the time not just one or Two I gave chance four times how could I be so. Solving worlds love life I never saw that my lover returns but that Guilt is always together with her. My effect on her was just Transparent, nothing ever stayed
Marr mukeyan toh jeen de sawaal puchchdi
Wichon khush h tu utton dukha naal puchchdi
ni pat jhadan wich patteyan daa haal pooch di ea
" tu jaan jaan ke ni "
Meaning and English Translation
u ask the questions of life from an almost dead
u ask with a sad face being happy inside
u ask leaves their condition in period of decline
u do it knowingly!!
Quite late, I need to eat something my living days are still On, its not my home need to get back on time before Gates are locked...
Tere sehar nu Sakda kar Challey
jeeti hoye baazi harr challey.
Nai auna kade fer palat ke
Sangdi marr jeyengi
Ja Saadey warga pyaar Kamaliye
labhdi marr jeyengi.
Translation someother Time